there's not many words I can find to begin this spell of words other than: hello, and wow. my goodness. it has been far too long.
the amount of change and abundance in love I had felt these past few months is exasperating — I've gone through the ringer with my health (all is fine now) which has left me feeling disenchanted with my old ways of thinking. no longer are the small tiffs that consumed my thoughts important, nor worthy of my time. no longer do I want to pass by the stranger sitting on the ground with a turned head. rather I'd like to smile, say hello, show warmth and welcome. I want to express to others how grateful I am to be alive, here, and present in this moment. I want to focus on the big things, not the miniscule. big in the sense of bigger than myself. spreading awareness, compassion, acceptance for all — I can't imagine doing anything better with my time. also big in the sense of letting go of fears, welcoming in creativity, and putting pen to paper, or brush to canvas.
passion has been ignited in me once again and I am forever grateful to these deep feelings of desire to create. I know not everyone has them. for that I feel I must listen to that feeling and just do it without expecting validation or anything in return. it can take many forms: photographs, paintings, crafts, mixed media, and words.
words. words are the form I fall back to most often, though I don't often share them with others. it's something I am working towards, though I'll continue with one less-private form, of this blog. I'm moving away from the old blog I had, and thinking of new names for it. there's a shift that has occurred within me, which pulls me towards a different idea and longing. directing the camera at my face is no longer desirable the way it used to be — though there will always be some of that, there's so much more I want to share. I am more than the clothes on my skin and the shoes on my feet. and I would like to release and show that.